I spent some time last night musing about the 25 years of the "old days" when I was taking my own call, taking care of inpatients on the floor and in ICU, having no life, and generally starting to feel I had made a terrible mistake in my choice of career. I can only reiterate that using an after hours service and letting the hospitalists run the hospital saved me. It was an adjustment.... sometimes I wonder if I am still a "real" doctor... but now I devote my energies to being the best outpatient physician I can be. I'm not tired, I have the energy to research questionable issues, I have the interest to listen to my patients and their problems, and I am pretty much over the need to feel that I can handle every possible aspect of care for everyone. I really like coming in to work, and I feel I do an honorable job better than I did before.
