OK, this is so ironic and slightly indicative of the conference in general. I was sitting on the diaz (is that the correct term) with nothing to do but yell at people (another chance to apologize for that), when Jon was talking about the advantage of messages being sent or how to, etc. I think I tried 10 times to tell him, but Jon, they need to auto-refresh. The fact that they don't isn't just frustrating, it makes for bad medicine, especially when you finally get around to your in box and realize there were three messages that should have been taken care of a while ago.
I don't really care much about HIPAA. I do care about patient confidentiality, but I think this would not be an issue. The computer should be locked anytime you are out of the room, and the worse thing that would happen with the messages would be a name and a subject. I suppose that would be an issue as well, so your ideas about an icon or whatever would be a good idea.
The best I can think of would be for the actual icon you click on to get the message should blink. It works on the boards as far as PMs. It blinks at the top.