Nate,
I too started as a PA working for two surgeons in a small Kentucky town. One of the guys was also boarded in Internal Medicine so I did a little bit of everything. I was comfortable when I knew they were watching over my shoulder or when they walked out of the OR and told me to close, knowing they were in the doctor's lounge if I needed them. But then they told me to close and left the building and I went "WHOA!!!! I do not know enough. I am not confident enough. I am not trained enough!" Scared the begeesus out of me. So I decided I needed to learn more, develop more leadership skills, gain the confidence needed to "take charge, make the final decision and stand by it". It was medical school, internship, residency that changed me from a follower to a leader. I had most of the skills already, I just needed the mindset. My family still cannot get over the transition in my personality, some for the good, some for the not so good. But, regardless, I am very different from the PA I once was, both in my skills as a physician and my skills as a leader. I know, as a PA, I was not good enough to do what was being asked of me.
