I've been attacked by a Bat, and yes a Mamamalian Bat not a Bronx Bomber Gang Fight Baseball Bat as some of you who know where I grew up might be thinking either...
My two friends and I while at hockey camp as young teenagers perhaps about 13 or 14 years old, had a bat get in our dorm room one night... It was scary at the time but it makes a great funny story later on... The thing nearly landed right on my face while my head was on my pillow looking up at it as we were just starting to realize in the dark what we were dealing with and barely seeing with almost no light in the room....
My bed was wedged inbetween my two friends so we could get all three of us in one room since we were all buds from home and went the same week to hang together... So my bed and headboard was up against the radiator cover and middle window part of the room.... And so the thing landed on the riser pipe for the radiator feeds and that pipe was right up against my pillow.... The poor thing had no Grip to hold on to a slippery pipe and for some reason it froze perhaps scared of us.... so instead of letting go and flying again, it decided to simply hold on for dear life and started sliding down the riser pipe right for my face!!! I freaked out and of course did the only sensible thing, I quickly hid my head and the rest of me under my sleeping bag.... I'll never forget that thing sliding right for me wondering why the hell won't it try to take off and fly around the room some more....
So one of my two friends covers himself with his sleeping bag and runs out into the hall to get the counselors... He's screaming "open up come quick there's an F'ing bat in our room!!!" The two guys stuck their heads out and the bat who had now exscaped our small room to full advantage of the situation and was doing laps up and down the long narrow hallway of this dorm set up..... So when the saw the bat wiz by their own faces they slammed the down in my friend Larry's face, leaving him and us feeling momentarially betrayed and abandoned....
So a few moments later these older teenage, perhaps college aged assistant coach counselors come flying out into the hallway both of them with jackets on, full helmets and facemasks, one armed with a Tennis Racket while the other had a Lacrosse Stick, and they proceeded to beat the snot out of this poor thing and had a nice volley going on there for quite some time...
And as this all errupted you've got to understand that it woke up even camper in ever room on that floor of the dorm, so you've got all these kids from about 8 or 9 years of age to about 17 all poking their heads out of cracked open doors with towels and blankets on their heads, some of them like layered two or three heads high in those cracked open doors taken this entire scene in.... It was the talk of the rest of our session, the three kids from the Bronx who had the F'ing Bat in their Room.... We were minor celeb's for a few days....
It was a great session of camp that summer with some awesome weird teen kid memories like that... Next time I'll have to tell you folks about my other Friend Neil and this "Great Balls of Fire!!!" Til next time.....
Paul
